The Name of Power

I did it because any form of power comes with duties. I’m obliged to take responsibility for my power, to learn its effects – even unintentional ones – to see what it does to others when I’m not watching, to use it in the best way possible. Sometimes to relinquish it.

No it’s not some “elaborate Spiderman speech,” as my lover dubbed it when I emailed him that quote. It’s actually a guy speaking about why he took his wife’s last name when they got married. The article is short, and has sparked a lot of interesting conversations. Of course, I can’t wait till the day where it won’t. Where taking your wife’s last night isn’t something novel. Although, in homosexual couples, I wonder how this dynamic works. Do they hyphenate? Does one change their name? Do names matter as much? I’m weird about names since I changed my last name, for a variety of reasons but mainly because it suited me better. I am attached to my last name because I made it up. It’s so personal to me, since it had nothing to do with family or lovers, just my own identity. So if I am ever put into a marriage, or a civil union, (although I don’t really ever see that day coming) I would be reluctant to change my last name. One, because I like it. Two, because I do not approve of the tradition of taking someone else’s family name (I dislike how one-sided it is). I probably would only change it if the other person’s name was awesome, and I mean awesome. I think ideally, I’d love to make up a name together.

The responsibility of power, and the duty of it, actually reminds me of The Little Prince. The part with the fox. That chapter comes the closest to my conceptions of love and friendship, taming and love, and duty and responsibility. The connection between them could be from the way I was raised. No Hollywood romances, but families bound by duty. I knew love, as awesome as it can be, also had a lot of power and responsibility. You become responsible for what you have tamed, or what has chosen to be tamed by you–whether or not you chose it. I think that’s the funny thing about power, and control (a series of conversations I seem to perpetually be having), it’s the responsibility that comes with it…regardless of your choice in the matter. I suppose the only choice you do have is what you do with it, and how kind and compassionate you are to others. You may not even know why you have that power over someone else (or multiple someone else’s) but the fact is you do. You can try to deter them. You can be as honest as you can to them about your situation or your lack of interest in their love or the power they give you. I doubt that’ll do much, really. What can you do is be kind, and try to make them understand that they do not have to give you that power. That they should spend it on someone else. Then again, you could always chose never to wield that power. Never to abuse or use it. But isn’t power and control so delicious?

Is the sacrifice worth it?

I miss writing about technology, privacy and security.

During WWII people gave up so much (silk and such) for the war effort in order to fight a semi-tangible enemy (at least one that had a specific geo-political border). I guess it’s only fair to give up something intangible for something intangible (Terror, Drugs…).

Yet how do you know when the war is over? When do the rations stop?

There was Godwin’s Law and there were Six Degrees of Seperation…now there’s Wolfe’s Law: It All Leads Back to Terrorism

There. I said it.

Just like with Godwin’s Law, how every conversation eventually brings up Nazis, and with Stanley Milgram’s “small world experiment”, how everyone is generally connected to anyone else by a few small degrees of separation…

Now, now I coin the phrase, after yours truly, Wolfe’s Law: Everything leads to Terrorism in one way or another.

The below example is only one of many. See how many you can come up with!

Spotting Links to Terrorism, Inc.

“As companies expand their global reach, they risk smudging their reputations by linking up with less-than-savory regimes. Even firms with good reputations reach into dark corners.

Take Royal Dutch/Shell. Although highly regarded for its environmental and human rights stances, the oil giant is drilling in Iran. Or consider Swedish carmaker Volvo. Despite its nice-guy image, it has sold trucks to Iraq.

Until Sept. 11, no group formally screened publicly traded companies for their links to terrorism or the spread of weapons of mass destruction. But as the United States has focused on terrorism, so some groups have begun to look at companies linked to it, even peripherally.

Earlier this month, a socially responsible investors group announced it had compiled a list of nearly 300 such firms. The group, the Investor Responsibility Research Center (IRRC), along with the Conflict Securities Advisory Group (CSAG), prefers to sell its list to subscribers (at $12,500 a year) rather than make it public. Nevertheless, the statistics it has released make interesting reading.

For example, of the 260 or so firms linked to countries supporting terrorism and developing weapons of mass destruction, a third are European. More than a quarter come from Asia. Only 10 percent are American.”

Hymens and Semen

No more worry about losing your virginity. With this product, you can have your first night back anytime. Insert this artificial hymen into your vagina carefully. It will expand a little and make you feel tight. When your lover penetrate, it will ooze out a liquid that look like blood not too much but just the right amount. Add in a few moans and groans, you will pass through undetectable. Its easy to use, clinically proven non-toxic to human and has no side effects, no pain to use, no allergic reaction.

Insert this artificial hymen into your vagina carefully. It will expand a little and make you feel tight. When your lover penetrate, it will ooze out a liquid that look like blood not too much but just the right amount. Add in a few moans and groan, you will pass through undetectable.

Main causes of hymen tore or break:

• Strenuous exercise (Gymnastics, sports, martial art, horse riding, etc)
• Premarital Sex
• Childhood accident (Hard object)
• Wearing a tampon for the first time

Made in Japan.
Expire: 2 years.

How to use:

• Open the package and rub on the artificial hymen, then carefully put into the vagina. If vaginal is dry, dip the artificial hymen to water and then put it into the vagina as quickly as you can.
• Place inside vagina 15-20 minutes before intercourse
• Finally, cleans the vulva after having sexual intercourse.

The best thing is that it’s cheaper the more you buy. So if you need to slut it up with…people who actually want their girl to bleed and look in pain the first time they have sex (because of some tissue flap, not for BDSM reasons)..then you might as well buy in bulk!

Qty	Pricing (for each)
1	USD 14.90
2	USD 13.90
3	USD 12.90

I wonder if virginity becomes a precious commodity in this recession. I mean, it would make sense that’s it’s ever more precious considering how sex-saturated (although sexually neurotic and unfulfilled) we are.

Speaking of sex. Semen has mind-control properties. You should read the full article, but I’ll post some enticing snippets.

“The more a woman has sex with her partner, the more committed she becomes, and the less attracted she is to other men — at least in the short-term. I blogged about this study several weeks ago”

“I describe a fascinating study at SUNY Albany that found that, yes, women who are regularly exposed to their partner’s semen are less depressed than women who use condoms most of the time. Hormones and proteins are absorbed through the vagina, enter the bloodstream, and possibly breach the blood-brain barrier.”

So long, good friend

VHS is finally dead.

“The last major Hollywood movie to be released on VHS was “A History of Violence” in 2006. By that point major retailers such as Best Buy and Wal-Mart were already well on their way to evicting all the VHS tapes from their shelves so the valuable real estate could go to the sleeker and smaller DVDs.”

I know, not my usual shocker article, but I’d like to pay homage to the VHS.  After it was made mainstream by porn, VHS has entertained us for something like three decades, really taking off in the 90’s.

So I’d like to write about some memories that I have with VHS. A eulogy, of sorts. Feel free to add your own memories in the comments section.

I remember still being in Russia, so I was under the age of 6, and how I thought my Grandpa was something close to god (secular Soviet home) because he could make TV stop, rewind, and play at will. I watched endless reruns of the same episodes of Gummi Bears (in Russian of course). I thought the TV power solely belonged to my Grandpa. Sure, I didn’t know it was a trusty VHS that held my joy on it, but there it was, a token of  my early childhood.

In case you’re curious as to what Gummi Bears sounds like in Russian..

You can only imagine my sheer happiness when I discovered that this strange new land, America, also had Gummi Bears, albeit in it’s own language. America also had those adorable little cheese wrapped in wax (Babybel), which I first met on the plane coming to the USA, where I promptly ate the cheese, wax and all, until some nice lady took pity on me and explained to me that I can take the wax off.

Oh VHS, I remember the sheer control. I could put it in, record anything I want on TV, play it back, record over it again. I remember recording mistakes. I remember footage being lost. I remember the joy of finding it again, accidentally, that as you’re watching some old cartoon, for nostalgia value as now you’re too told for the cartoon, that you recorded at a very tender age that would get interrupted midway through by the porn that you recorded from the TV at that same tender age.

I remember feeling so powerful. I could capture moments. I could rewind and play at will. I could erase. Maybe this sounds so geeky, but the idea that one could take memories from the TV without permission. We don’t have that anymore. We pay for it. We are also watched. Someone else knows what we record. What we prefer. The privacy is gone. That was really the glory of VHS, video home system, the privacy in your own home. Obviously this was primarily for porn purposes in the beginning, as it’s nicer to watch it at home instead of some peep show theater. With VHS we had our own personal cinema. It was so revolutionary. It was so intimate. I loved hitting pause, and then play and watching everything move very very slowly. I loved the noise of the machine when it would fast forward or rewind. You could feel the little guy working.

I remember the anticipation of tracking. When the tape was too old and it would be fuzzy and not so perfect, and you would hold your breath hoping that tracking would fix it. I remember actually the days before auto-tracking and how that was a bitch and a half to set the levels just right. It was a sense of pride and accomplishment every time I made a video look good.

I loved the working technology as a kid, but I also loved it when my parents gave me the important task of destroying videos as well. I’d pull the black tape out and out and dance with it in the house. Sometimes I would rewind it manually with my fingers. See if I could put it back together. See if I could undo it more. I would braid it into my hair, then take it out because I wasn’t allowed to look like that outside the house. I loved how tangible VHS was.

My college house still has a ton of VHS tapes. Old Disney movies, not digitally remastered, that we gather around and watch. We bask in the feeling of being young again. Of the tape sometimes being soft around the edges. How everything wasn’t so perfect, and that is, and was, part of the appeal. Nothing more exciting than taking that clunky VHS tape and watching the VCR eat it. No menu screen with options. Just ff and then play. No DVD that sits and keeps replaying the menu screen over and over.

Don’t get me wrong. I love the new digital world. Yet sometimes I miss the fuzzy memories of my youth.

So goodbye and so long, VHS. You done good. I know others will make a far more creative and artistic omage to you. You might get some gallery installations. Some modern art pieces. Maybe a movie and documentary. Maybe a porno.

But you will never again teach young immigrant girls how to capture memories on their own. Don’t worry, VHS, your memory is already captured. It keeps playing inside. My generation watches your graceful death. You embody the death of our childhood.

“Millons of homecrafters face bankruptcy after Jan 20 from new law”

The January 20 2009 deadline for millions of American homecrafters to object to a new law requiring expensive testing of their products, is approaching fast. Child-products without certificates proving they have no lead content, will have to be scrapped.

The new Consumer Product Safety Improvement Act – passed hastily to bar poisonous foreign products – also will require millions of American homecrafters to have each of their products tested at huge cost, ranging from $500 to $4000 per product – including their old stock which was manufactured before this law had even been thought up.

No more selling old things on eBay or Craigslist…
And all the products sold on eBay or Craigslist will also require such certificates of compliance or they will be breaking the law. Also affected: millions of charities, which will no longer be able to accept donations without a certificate of compliance. And this certificate can only be obtained through expensive testing by an SCPC-accredited laboratory.” Without such certificates, billions of dollars worth of uncertified children’s products will have to be destroyed because they can’t be legally sold without an CPSI-certificate of compliance, and this will cause major environmental problems,” said Massachusetts campaigner Kiki Fluhr.

“Larger corporations that can afford testing will incur thousands, maybe millions of dollars in fees, and this expense will be handed down to the consumer, probably making the prices for children’s products go through the roof.” Fluhr: “This law will put thousands of manufacturers of children’s products out of business -hurting our economy and causing even more loan defaults. Though this legislation was well-intentioned, it cannot be allowed to stand.”

“This law affects every stay at home mom trying to help put food on the table and every grandmother knitting blankets for the local craft fair. It makes the thousands of us who have found a niche in the burgeoning handmade market have to make a tough decision – continue to produce items illegally and possible incur a $100,000 fine, or close up shop and maybe not be able to pay the mortgage this month….”

That really sucks. What will wonderful websites like Etsy do? Why are we trying to kill off small-time artisans..especially with this economy? Is our land really the land of the corporate?

Gosh. I used to buy diy items on Ebay all the time. Special little items that someone else used and can now sell to me rather than throwing it away.This will only encourage people to buy new products rather than invest less money in more durable items. No more hand-me-downs. No more individual craftsartists.

This really makes everything seem so bleak. If it’s not factory-mass-produced, you can’t have it. What a crazy monopoly that we are presenting to large businesses. I’m rather distraught about this. If you click on the above link to the article there is a petition you can sign. As useful as that is.

Golly gee, can you imagine a black market for used products? People trying to sell their hand-made soap and jewelry? We could write dystopias on this.

But again, it’s not just the trouble of having a harder time consuming cheaply…charities are affected. I remember before I left England we randomly found a soup kitchen workshop and we asked them where we could donate our clothes and blankets since I can’t take them with me. She told us to bring them over tomorrow, they’d wash them for us. It was nice just to pack bookbags of clothes, blankets and other trinkets and give them to an organization directly.

The law isn’t evil, it’s trying to protect. Yet within this protection there is an excess. Sure we’re trying to keep people safe, but within the zealotry people get hurt, small businesses suffer, small people who can’t even count as a small business suffer.

“No US president has ever died under the same flag that he was born under.”

Textbook Buy-back

If the Real World Used Textbook Buy-Back Policies

Buyer: I’ll give you $5,000 for it.
Homeowner: Are you crazy? I just paid $100,000 for it in January. Haven’t you heard of value appreciation?
Buyer: All I’m hearing is that your house is used.
Homeowner: Hardly. I spent like 2 days there in March and then 6 hours yesterday. This house is in perfect condition.
Buyer: Oh yeah, what’s this note above the backdoor?
Homeowner: It says, “Low door. Mind your head.”
Buyer: Low door, huh?
Homeowner: Yeah, but that’s not a problem. It’s just a feature of the house. It’s supposed to be like that. That’s just a helpful note in case people didn’t notice the height of the door.
Buyer: It sullies the whole house. The whole house is crap because of that note!
Homeowner: What are you talking about? This isn’t even a pretty house.
Buyer: So you admit it!
Homeowner: Yeah. It’s a stupid looking house on a boring block, but people still want to buy it. Haven’t you heard of supply and demand?
Buyer: Nope. And I’m not going to give you more than $5,000 for this dump. That’s just policy.
Homeowner: What are you talking about? What policy?
Buyer: Just policy.
Homeowner: Well, maybe I won’t sell it to you. Who knows, I might need this house in the future. It’s got pretty cool…faucets. I might want to use those. Ugh, fine. Give me the stupid 5 grand.
Buyer: Great doing business with you.
Ex-Buyer: Attention, all prospective buyers! Who wants to buy this fantastic, mint-condition home for $90,000?
Ex-Homeowner: What?!
Ex-Buyer: Sucker.

The thirst of many honesties (hah, so punny, get it?)

Dear blog, I made a fool of myself in class. True, this is a common occurrence, but I am hardly bothered by it.

I pretended to be some sleazy salesgirl (although not as bad as those Cricket Baby girls)  trying to sell rubber tubing to companies other than medical/industrial ones.

So our professor said to take risks. To be honest, she’s right. To be honest, the other students, the ones who want to play it safe, who posted replies in their blogs that when they do something not by-the-book they get scolded, and so they rather not take such a risk…are not wrong either. The problem, is that they’re not doing something different. They’re just taking the prescription wrong.

But enough of us will have bosses who make ridiculous demands of us. Yes, make an awesome PowerPoint in 5 minutes.  Impossible task that will likely result in failure. I treat this as prep. Hell, I did have a supervisor that made crazy demands of me this past summer. But I knew I wouldn’t get fired, because even if I couldn’t read her mind, I was one of the best, if not the best graphic designer intern they’ve had thus far. I know that my grade does not depend on the amount of scolding. So in way, I’m not worried about it. I calculate my risks. But I still take them.

I’d rather beg for forgiveness than ask for permission.

A personal motto, I suppose.

Thing is, I figured that for this class, unlike any other class, risks, no matter how foolish, would be rewarded in some fashion or another.  I mean, for this class, we were totally encouraged to take risks. Make the environment our own. There’s playing it safe, and there’s playing it scared. Again, what’s the worse that can happen? Some scolding? Pft. Whatever. No one can scold you better than your own family. So really, no one scares me in that respect. Sure, I don’t bite the hand that feeds me, gives me my grade, and gives me a paycheck. That doesn’t mean I sit in wait for the next command.

Dear blog, what makes a better blog? The blog on politics and culture, or the one…that..tells my story?

Fetish or Excuse?

We are what we pretend to be, so we must be careful what we pretend to be.
— Kurt Vonnegut, MOTHER NIGHT

For me, this quote goes to the heart of my consumption class. It both concerns and amuses me that I am always drawn to the arguments of theorists that advocate a totalizing system. Durkheim, Adorno and Horkheimer, Baudrillard, Weber… Why is it those theorists that create a world in which there is no individual or resistance, and that even resistance is, how we say, futile, that make sense to me? Why couldn’t be the cuter theorists? Why don’t I take them seriously at all? Why don’t I like Fiske’s argument that shopping is an empowering act for women, and that malls are the new public sphere that women can safely excel in without throwing away their femininity. Why is that unconvincing for me? I mean, I called him a “cute theorist”–that’s not nice. I for some reason do not consider him a serious academic because his theory isn’t as dominating as all the others.

Don’t I like resisting? Am I not an individual? If I did not believe resistance is possible–then why would I ever take these classes? Why would I ever want to know the true madness behind the methodology, if I couldn’t (or someone else) do anything about it? Would it be possible to know about the system, to see the invisible threads forcing us to need and consume, if there was no way out? Why wouldn’t I just be taking nice pleasant classes that keep me in my cave?

Do I simply prefer to have the excuse of the “totalizing system” if I fail to change anything?

Or, is it something more perverse in that since I’ve never had a typical patriarchal father figure that I am trying to find the image of the father that screams “NO!” in the oedipal sense in theory? Am I sublimating my desire for authority by only respecting theorists who have theories that restrict any movement or freedom? Do I need the security of control, rules, and boundaries, and so I prefer theories of large, ubiquitous theories that bind us all under a system of power and control?

I’ve been feeling incredibly faint, weary and dizzy the past two days from my period. When I feel like this I don’t want a domineering father figure but someone soft to cuddle, an animal is actually the most preferable in this instance. Everything is woozy. I nearly fainted in my class today. I’ve never fainted in my life, and I aim to keep it that way. I felt very pale and my limbs felt too large for my body. Thankfully my mouth obeyed my brain and I didn’t say something silly. You know, something silly like, I could have said something crazy about fetishing systems of domination and control to replace a male figure in my life to many people…